OJ Simpson's Hypothetical Cell Mate Writes Book About How He Would Hypothetically Rape Him
And in another strange twist, this reporter has learned that a prisoner at the California State Penitentiary, Cletis Tallywhacker, is penning a short novela about how he would have hypothetically raped O.J. Simpson if he had been his hypothetical cellmate.
Simpson's Novel is titled If I Did It while Tallywhacker's book is called If I Could Get Me Some Hall Of Fame Running Back Booty.
According to prison officials, Tallywhacker has long been obsessed with Simpson, and killed several other prisoners in rage when O.J. was acquitted and his hopes for intimacy with him were dashed. They are hoping that the book is an outlet.
"There's no harm in our prisoners playing out their fantasies in writing," said Prison Warden Hal Souder. "And I'm thrilled that Mr. Tallywhacker has accurately depicted our guards ignoring Mr. Simpson's pleas for help. Hypothetically, of course."
