Thursday, April 10, 2008


You know what's great about being a conservative - besides the orgies, the high grade stimulants and the free snuff films? The way people who hated you when you were alive now like you when you're dead. When Reagan died, he was praised by scoundrels who dogged him all his life, and now the same thing is happening to straight-up, bad-ass Charlton Heston.

An obvious example, of course, is the New York Times - which rarely had a kind word to say about either man. But now that they're dead - the Times had nothing but carefully worded praise for their careers.

And then there's Michael Moore. Probably the biggest - and most sanctimonius sack of feces on the planet - he's widely known for stitching up a confused Heston in his anti-gun movie Bowling for Columbine. Moore told Heston he was a lifetime member of the NRA - a sleazy ploy to get the actor to talk to him.

While being filmed, Moore mercilessly chided Heston on his pro-gun stance, while a befuddled and clearly fatigued Heston remains polite until he finally gets up and leaves. But of course, Moore chases him down (not hard since Heston hobbles) to wave photo of a dead child in his face. Moore, beyond sorrowful, leaves the photo on Chuck's patio. The creep thinks he creamed Chuck, but he came out the fool. It was disclosed later that he had Alzheimer's. Heston, not Moore.

I bring up Moore because if you go to his Web site, you'll find a memorial photo of Heston, along with the date of his birth and death. If Moore was any kind of man, hed take that down, instead of pretending to care. But the world is far from perfect. If it was, Chuck would shot him for trespassing back when he had the chance.