Dems Reveal Detailed Iraq Strategy
Democrat strategists have just revealed a detailed plan that they believe will ensure victory in Iraq. Democrats have come under fire from conservatives in general, and President Bush in particular, over their constant complaining about the situation in Iraq while offering no solution of their own.
"I think the American people are really going to get behind my party's new initiative," said Senator Joe Biden. "President Bush has called us irresponsible for not putting forth a plan for Iraq. Well, if he doesn't okay this logically sound plan, then I think we all know who is being irresponsible.'"
Biden scoffed at those who call the idea "unrealistic" and "out of touch with reality."
"The plan calls for genetically engineering an army of miniature diplomats and placing them inside of hollowed-out robotic tuna," said Biden. "The 'Trojan Tuna' will then be left at the home or PO Box (if it happens to be a jihadist away on a weekend retreat at his cabin) of the freedom fighter in question. Once the recipient is asleep, the miniature diplomats will extricate themselves from the tuna and strike up a conversation with the freedom fighter. After a rapport has been established, the diplomat will explain carefully to the freedom fighter that we mean them no harm, and that we are working hard against our common enemy- the Christian right. However, we will make it clear that things must be done in a less violent manner. Perhaps a Supreme Court nominee can be found among the insurgents so they will have a chance to make their voices heard on U.S. policy issues. Then they will be less likely to blow things up. Pretty impressive plan, huh? Who's 'out of touch' now?"